Archive for October, 2009

Community Architecture: the first retreat: the recap: the subject line: colons!


A momentous occasion occurred last week: Max, Greg, Karsten, and I were all in the same room at the same time. For four consecutive days. Usually getting us all in the same timezone is already an impossible accomplishment. However, for the Community Architecture retreat, the heavens move. What follows is a Mel’s-eye-view.

Sunday October 11

  • 5:25am flight. Yay.
  • Rental cars are much cheaper when Karsten drives! (I am going to have such a big celebration on my 25th birthday when we no longer have to pay Young Driver fees.)
  • Wow, Raleigh has beaches. Also: spicy pineapple marmalade is one of those things that sounds weird, but tastes fantastic.
  • Want North Carolina BBQ.

Monday October 12

  • What is this “community” thing that we do, and how does it fit into Red Hat? How can we set a good example – and do even more active outreach around that example? We need to do more work on the notion of a “community health dashboard” and articulate the difference between goals and assists – there’s a difference between “we did it,” “it wouldn’t
    have happened without us,” and “it may have happened anyway, but we helped.”
  • Paul Frields drives down from VA to join us! Planning for Fedora 12 filming later in the week ensues, a fascinating process to me because I’ve never heard this type of conversation from the other side of the camera before (I was an A/V workstudy in high school).
  • Education – what’s happening in this space? Answer: teachingopensource.org (particularly work on the textbook) and hfoss.org (particularly a working group designing a certificate program) and a strong focus on post-secondary education because that’s where there’s space to move right now; we only have bandwidth to amplify and connect the K12 activity we come across for now – there are others doing fantastic work in the K12 space.
  • POSSE – the upcoming POSSE APAC and how POSSE will totally kick ass as it expands around the world. (Okay, I’m biased, this was my section.)
  • Large amounts of grilled fish for dinner. Mmm. And shrimp. And mussels. Still waiting for North Carolina BBQ.


Tuesday October 13

  • Summer of Code session: Karsten lays out Fedora’s performance and progress (very good) and whether we should continue (oh yes).
  • Fedora marketing: Mel explains the challenges (biggest blocker: lack of capacity and domain expertise) and triumphs (Fedora Insight coming out!) so far. Making the production of marketing deliverables into an easy, regular thing by building a library of examples, HOWTOs, and good tools will give us breathing room to be able to think more strategically for the F13 cycle.
  • FUDCon Toronto update: it’s going to rock.
  • A general “what’s up in Fedora?” update all-around, because the flood of public mailing lists is impossible for any one person to read, and everyone’s got different bits they have been watching.
  • Exodus to bar. Discovery of multiple types of chocolate beer (via mpdehaan’s beverage choices); awe.
  • Still waiting for North Carolina BBQ.


Wednesday October 14

  • How do we do that dashboard we’ve been thinking about for so long?
  • Watch Carolina Hurricanes get clobbered by Pittsburgh Penguins in an extended shootout. Watching hockey is fun! It’s the first time for both me and Karsten; Max and Greg share season passes. Everybody yells a lot. (Voices are noticeably scratchier the next morning.)
  • Still waiting for North Carolina BBQ.

The team, at hockey. I’m not in the shot because I’m crammed into the corner taking the picture, but there is a Mel in the shot that isn’t me; bonus points for whoever can explain, and mega bonus points for up-close pictorial evidence on why Greg’s jacket in this picture is hilarious. Also: I think I may have either the shortest – if not, second shortest – hair on the team, despite being the only female; I do know from pictures that everyone else on the team has had, at some point, longer hair than I have ever had in my entire life. This is the only picture I took that week that wasn’t of a whiteboard filled with notes.

Thursday October 15

  • Wrap up, set priorities
  • Wow, we’re traveling a lot between now and 2010. (Everyone else: “Awww.” Me: “AWWW YEAH!”)
  • NORTH CAROLINA BBQ!
  • …followed by terrible weather in Atlanta that strands Karsten in GA and causes me to ditch my plane ride for a rental car and a 285mi drive north in the middle of the night; Karsten and I eventually get home.


Friday October 15

  • I miss North Carolina BBQ.
  • I am spending the summer in Raleigh. PIGS, FEAR ME!

Quotes of the week:

Greg: We do not have fixed resources. We have variable resources of unknown quantity until we go and do this:
Greg: ping!
Greg: ping!
Greg: ping!
Greg: ping!
Greg (shouting, standing up, waving arms frantically) GO GO GO GO GO BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM!

Karsten (to Max): You worry too much. But keep doing it.

Somebody, I Forget Who: Community is not a magic wand. It will force-multiply on what already exists.

CommArch, shortly before hockey game starts: Oh no, Mel found a book!


Request your FUDCon funding now: cutoff Thursday 19:30 UTC


We’d like to wrap up budgeting for FUDCon Toronto 2009 as the happy date draws nearer. And we need your help. Ask us for money!

We have budget set aside to help with the travel of community members who would not otherwise be able to afford the trip to FUDCon. Instructions are at http://fedoraproject.org/wiki/FUDCon:Toronto_2009#Requesting_funding. These are the same instructions that everyone who indicated a need for funding help during pre-registration got. We’ve been processing those funding applications for the past few weeks, and we wanted to make absolutely sure that everyone who wanted to request funding has gotten a chance to do so before the cutoff date, Thursday October 29 at 19:30 UTC. Our budget is finite in size, but we are doing our best to bring as many people over as possible, and are making our decision process completely transparent – the instructions on how to request funding also have a link to meeting logs so you can see how we’ve made the choices that we did so far.

One note: If you’re on the fence and wondering whether you should request funding or not, please ask. The more we know about what people need, the more we can figure out the best way to help – for instance, even if we can’t fully fund someone, we might be able to partially fund them, or hook them up with a carpool or a bus seat, or find a way for them to participate remotely. As someone who would have, a year ago, probably not sent in a funding application due to a desire not to cause any extra trouble, I can honestly say (as this FUDCon’s co-planner) that giving us this information actually helps us plan. So you’d be doing us a favor, really. Seriously, ASK.

Heck, even if you don’t need funding to come to FUDCon, putting your FUDCon plans in the pre-registration table would be awesome, so that folks can find out who’s up to what. So in short, the request:

  1. If you need FUDCon travel funding, ask for it. Before Thursday 19:30 UTC.
  2. If you don’t need FUDCon travel funding, tell us what you’re doing anyway. Having a game plan to adapt and improvise from (and occasionally completely throw away) often makes for a better event experience, because you come in with a target goal in mind.

Thanks – we’ll see you in Toronto in a few weeks!


A train of thought I haven’t looked at for a while


Reading this article set off a complex chain of mixed feelings. I see now why Caitlin wanted to talk with me about this when I was on campus for graduation in May – I’m looking forward to that conversation (and others on related topics with various people) when I return to Boston for the spring.

First thought: “It’s never stopped me.” Second thought: “I wonder how he sees the world, what life is like, that he would say these things.” Third thought: “Hm – Caitlin, too.” Third thought: “Well… that first thought isn’t entirely true. It has made some things harder. And made a few things hard enough that I chose not to do them.” Fourth thought: “….fascinating.

My hearing aids are out of batteries. I hope I’ll find the right onesĀ  somewhere in Toronto in the morning; it would be nice to be able to listen to the sounds of the city in all the ways I can. I wonder if I’ll get a chance to let this train of thought run out some more when I’m in Rochester; the Jacobs family helped my thinking on this tremendously the last time I was in town.


SLOBs: coming up with a decision-making process


I’m going to try to start blogging about Sugar Labs Oversight Board (SLOBs) happenings each Friday after our meeting, for radical-transparency-fu. This is not a Voice That Cometh From On High; I’m speaking only for myself and what I’ve heard and seen and what I’m thinking about what’s happening with project governance for any given week. Keep in mind that this is the first time I’ve ever been on a governing body for… anything, just about – so you’re reading through the eyes of someone who’s learning just about everything about being a SLOB member – or being on any board, really – as she goes along.

The new batch of SLOBs has been in office for 10 days. Our first meeting was on Oct. 16, 2009 (logs), with everyone present – returning SLOBs Chris Ball, Walter Bender, Bernie Innocenti, and Tomeu Vizoso, and new SLOBs Sean Daly, Adam Holt, and myself. Our second meeting was today, Oct. 23, 2009 (logs) with special guest Karen Sandler from the Software Freedom Law Center (SFLC) joining us to clarify the status of the trademark procedures that SFLC is writing for Sugar Labs.

I’ve learned two very important things so far:

  1. Mark authorization (use of the term “Sugar Labs,” for instance) is granted by the Software Freedom Conservancy to SLOBs, and SLOBs in turn can delegate that authority to others. The aforementioned trademark procedures being written by SFLC should help considerably with clarifying this.
  2. It’s very, very difficult for SLOBs to do anything because it’s unclear how we can, as a body, make decisions – and what classes of decisions we can (and should) be able to make.

I’d like to address the second, since I think it’s the first thing that we need to do to make SLOBs a more effective governing body. We have a lot of pressing issues to cover – trademarks, relationships with companies, etc – and we need to have the ability to deal with these issues well. So this evening, I proposed that we dedicate our next meeting to getting a decision-making process up and running.

Tomeu and I have started a brainstorm for various options we could choose from, and we’re asking for help. That call has been out for several days, and will have been out for a week and a half by the time the next SLOBs meeting comes around; I think that’s enough time to solicit thoughts on a first working version (remember, we’re also building in the ability for this procedure to amend itself, so at worst, we should only have to live with our mistakes for a few weeks if there are any). Please add your thoughts and discuss them on the mailing list thread. (Yes, it’s the same two links again. They are important.)

That’s pretty much what I’m going to be working on between now and the next meeting (agenda). It’s on Friday, October 30, at 14:00 UTC in #sugar-meeting on irc.freenode.net – please share your thoughts either on this blog post, on the mailing list, or in the wiki. (You go it. Really important links.) Talk about it on IRC and post your conversation logs to iaep. This is a chance to help determine how Sugar Labs runs.

…and that’s what’s on my mind with SLOBs right now. Thanks for listening.


Budgeting time


This is another post that’s written to track the trails I’m thinking on; it’s therefore long and does not necessarily make sense, and I may change my mind on things by the end of it.

September’s experiment was a mutual deal between myself and Andrew wherein he would write a request for help in a letter every day, and I would get 6 hours of continuous sleep every day. I had far from a perfect record, but learned a lot from trying Specifically, I learned that 6 hours is Way Too Much – somewhere around 4 feels more right – but that not having wildly varying bedtimes from day to day is actually a good idea. Not that I need a strict bedtime, but that now I know that sleeping at 10pm one night and 4am the next and 1am the next night feels less good than, say, hovering around 1am all three days. Knowing the tradeoff. (Yeah, yeah, I know, all books on sleep will tell you that, but I needed to experimentally determine whether that applied to me as well.)

October was an experimental reversion of that, and some of the other things I’ve tried (being mostly-vegetarian, having an actual RSI prevention routine). I wanted to see what would stick and what wouldn’t, and what would be bad to slip. Turns out that an actual RSI prevention routine (loose timers to remind me rather than “I’ll deal with it when I feel things coming up because I’m much more sensitive to this now” is a good idea – not so much for my hands as my peace of mind – and that being mostly-vegetarian is something that stuck, and feels good, though I need to try to be a little more regular about meals. As in, not eating for 36 hours due to utter distractedness, then gorging on a giant fried burrito (that’s what a chimichanga seems like, anyway)  the size of your head… is not the best idea.

November’s already booked with NaNoWriMo, for the record. I’ll be doing the writing; it won’t necessarily be a novel.

One thing I’ve been thinking about a lot recently is how long my freakish amounts of energy are likely to last. I don’t think my capacity to Do Stuff has gone down since I started noticing that I was in perpetual overdrive in a way that people around me weren’t (somewhere around 5th or 6th grade) – not smarter or faster or anything, just… itchier, antsier, no-really-my-brain-can’t-sit-still-ier. Not more than all, but more than most.

But as I’ve gotten more conscious of it and learned how to harness it better, my work habits have gotten mellower; I no longer pull quadruple allnighters to streak like a speeding demon towards something and then crash mightily at the end. Granted, I only did that between the ages of 15-17, when my Young And Stupid (Now With More Independence!!!) meter was constantly overrunning its limit; more often I would just sleep 5 days a week and crash more lightly after those two regular allnighters. Not that that’s a good idea either.

And right now, I can direct most if not all of my energy towards things that are work-like. This means my actual job as well as the various things I volunteer for, but mostly it means that I can wake up in the mornings and go OUTPUTOUTPUTOUTPUT! with some quiet pauses, long rambles, exuberant spurts of energy, small spontaneous moments interspersed to recharge me, and then sleep (typically early the next morning) feeling good and tired, and repeat. I only need a buffer for myself, and it’s not very large. I don’t need a buffer for a boyfriend or a husband or kids. If I lock into hyperfocus mode and forget about time, I’m not missing a school pick-up or leaving someone without dinner. Nobody will sit up late at night waiting anxiously for me to come home; nobody will complain my work travel takes me away from them too much. I’m not causing trouble.

And to have this time where I am decoupled from that is wonderful in many ways. And I still get to hang out with friends, and we have even more intense conversations now that the time we spend with each other is precious rather than normal-pass-you-in-the-hall-at-school. And I seem to be on better terms with family when I appreciate them in, say, one-week doses every month or two (or in the case of my brother, online with emails and chat and the occasional “hey, we’re in the same place! let’s eat!*”)  rather than constant expectations to keep track of everything all the time. And seriously, I don’t want to have to worry about someone else right now. I want to be able to sneak in late at night and nuke a plate of leftovers and kick my shoes off and crash down to sleep and be fine. Right now.

*my brother can eat more than I can; he has my genes, but in the body
of a 20-year-old athletic young man. If you ever buy him dinner,
consider going to a buffet.

But maybe someday these things will change. Either or both of them. I may someday have less energy (I hear this happens when you get older), and I may someday have to spend it to take care of people who are Not Me, constantly and consistently. And I know that some relationships can’t happen in spontaneously scheduled spurts that may have weeks or months between them. To some extent, this might be easier to work out logistically if I were a guy. (Not that this situation’s right, mind you. Just that it is easier to arrange in the cultures I move in.) Maybe I’ll get lucky and find someone who really wants to be that steady presence in the family, ’cause I don’t think I can be that. But even so, it’s still… another balance that I’d have to strike. And I’m trying to learn to juggle and strike enough now balances right now that I can’t do that. Another experiment and risk and balance that affects just me, sure; I can tumble down, that’s fine. But to take the risk of someone else crashing because of something I did, knowing I’ll manage it poorly – that wouldn’t be responsible of me. (I’m in publictest. Not even ready to move to staging, let alone production.)

So right now, I’m learning how to budget my time. How to not go as far as I could go on something so that I’ll have more time for something else. Recognizing that even manic-Mel-worksprints can’t do everything, and that I need to pick the few things that will have the biggest impact, do them, and then stop. Trouble is, I’m new enough to most everything that I don’t know what those few things are, so I’ve got to try them all to see; that’s fine. It’s wild experimental overboarding, but with plans to move away from it. So I can, y’know, with the saved time, go completely bonkers on something else. Woo! (But really, someday, I may allocate that saved time to things like… family. Or school! School is another good thing to carve out time for.)

And with Sugar Labs (I was elected to the Oversight Board last week for a two-year term) I’m having my first strict time-budget project. I can only do SLOBs stuff.  (Sugar Labs Oversight Board – I love this acronym.) I should not code or do design or write docs or debug computers unless it is directly related to SLOBs stuff. I can spend as much time on SLOBs stuff as I spend exercising, which has so far been easy since I bike-commute everywhere and only let my to-do list for SLOBs grow to about 2-3 hours per week including meetings. (So far. It’s been a week and a half.) I prep for weekly meetings (reading mailing lists beforehand, etc), I go to them, I try to make them run efficiently and well (a little better and more efficiently each time), I get my thoughts in order afterwards. Once I have that down more, and can do it faster, I’ll have time to send out better notes and blog out my reflections to Planet Sugar Labs. But the point is, I’m not doing that yet, because I can’t get it all in under time yet. I hit my time limit and I stop and move on with my life and try again the next week.

Yeah, it feels extremely weird. And I know that in the short term I’d be more effective if I didn’t try to learn this discipline. But in the long run, it’s better for everyone. After all, whoever gets my seat after my term expires will probably not have crazy large amounts of free time to spend doing this either – and it behooves me to get my job (or what I consider to be my job) down to a size where someone else can take it on and live. It feels like an excuse to be lazy (because I’m doing less work), but I know that’s far from the truth because it’s harder for me to do less work. But… y’know. Long term planning. Planning so that I don’t have to plan, planning to be spontaneous and crazy. It works out.

All right. I’m ready for the SLOBs meeting now. Time to go and do that prep – this, at least, with mail filtering, I’ve gotten down to less than ten minutes. Hoo-yah.


Week in review + “Fedora” in ASL


This week has been a good week – productive worksprints interspersed (heck, in some cases deliberately interrupted) by outings with friends in the DC area. I don’t have much time left in DC due to Massive Amounts Of Travel between now and December when I leave, so I’m making the most of it now.

Monday: Copyright geekery over a Burmese lunch (thanks, Kat Walsh!), followed by empanadas and a long stint working from a coffeeshop, followed by sitting in on an ISOC meeting out of sheer curiosity. It was impressive, what they did to make the meeting accessible to folks who couldn’t physically be there – not just taking notes and having a call-in line and posting things online, but how the entire assembly present was continuously conscious and considerate that there were remotees, and that they ought to be fully considered and accommodated.

Tuesday: Amsterdam Falafel with Kat, worksprinting on the textbook while sitting on a curb off a side street in front of someone’s scooter, feet on cobblestones, people bustling down the main street a couple dozen feet away. Plenty of bike riding; it feels good to pump up hills a little easier now, sail down sloped streets at close to top speed and still be in full control, to coast to a stop in the driveway and sling off your jacket and your helmet and feel a breath of wind cool the slight band of sweat on your forehead.

Wednesday: Finally visited the Museum of the American Indian food court (thanks, Jason Hoekstra!) and have discovered this delicious stuff called spoon bread. Mmm, pumpkin spoon bread. Proceeded to work from the sunny, sunny lobby of the gorgeous museum for the afternoon, then wrapped up the evening with bubble tea and free food at the Catholic student center of the University of Maryland with Erin Dowd (and then a late-night worksprint). I have yet to do the Air and Space Museum, and would also like to see the Library of Congress at some point. I’ve already done the late-night bike-through of the monuments. And Erin tells me that hockey games around here are a lot of fun too, so we might watch a game at some point before I move back to Boston. (I feel like I’ve been introduced to a lot of dangerous things in the last few months… hockey, North Carolina BBQ, GSM USB peripherals, Kramerbooks & Afterwords…)

Thursday: Over massive amounts of apple pie, Mackenzie and I made up signs for a few Linux distros we were tired of fingerspelling all the time. (I do the Fedora sign with the infinity semi-diagonal – as if it were tracing the infinity in the Fedora logo – she does it as if it were the mathematical symbol.) As far as we know, they don’t collide with any actual ASL words. And as far as I know, there isn’t any other sign for Fedora. So I’m going to use this one.

To sign “Fedora” (for those who might not be able to see the videos):

  1. Take your right hand and make the “OK” sign (thumb and index finger touching in a circle, other three fingers extended, palm facing out)
  2. Move your hand in the shape of the “infinity” symbol – to the right, then up and to the left in a loop, then down, then up and to the right so that you end up where you started, your hand having traced a sort of diagonal figure 8 in the meantime.

That’s it. If you want to say “I am Fedora,” just sign “Fedora” and then point to yourself. If you want to say “Fedora 12,” sign “Fedora” and then the number 12 (make a closed fist and hold it in front of you, with the back of your hand facing out and your hand oriented so that if your fingers were extended, they would be pointed up. Then flick your index and middle fingers out together, twice). And here’s our F12 release slogan (though I might also follow it up with this sign).

I’ll ask Steve when I get to RIT to make sure there really aren’t any word collisions, but if there aren’t, I’m going to do a little bit of filming…

PS: I’d also like to shout a thank-you to Bert Desmet for beginning to put together the FUDCon Toronto shirt design – when I saw the current version (the coloring still remains to be done) I just about fell over laughing. Take a look and you’ll see why. (Hint: Lower right-hand petal.)


Can’t sleep, so I’m going to write about dreams.


My dreams enjoy toying with me. Sunday morning I dreamt that I’d gotten up to a lovely, sunny day – early morning, but that’s okay! I go downstairs, my little brother’s there, he offers to drive me to the airport – I’m pleasantly surprised and accept… our next-door neighbor holds her little terrier in one hand and waves goodbye with the other, and Jason and I climb into Dad’s car (our favorite) and head out early enough to get some food at Steak N’ Shake…

…and then I wake up and discover that no, it’s 6am, pitch black, cold and raining, and I get to take public transit to the airport.

Separately, Sunday morning, I dreamt of my GMAT score report, which I still haven’t seen the final version of, although MBA programs are starting to send me things despite my (stated) lack of any plans whatsoever to actually get an MBA. I take this as an indication that I did not completely bomb the writing section.

It’s been a while since I had dreams. I know I dreamt last night, but can’t remember them. I wonder if I’ll dream tonight. I’m going to try to.


Why is Boston cold? Why do I live there? Oh right. Geekiness!


David pointed out to me that spending winter in Boston and summer in Raleigh is precisely backwards from what a sane person seeking moderate weather would do. I am not sane, but I do appreciate moderate weather. And for me, moderate means “over 70 degrees Fahrenheit, consistently, with sun.” Which begs the question of why my state of legal residence SNOWS IN THE MIDDLE OF OCTOBER.

I’m mildly tempted to spend 2-4 weeks in February working from Nashville or Florida or California or somewhere… warmlike, in order to not be driven batty by extended lack of sun. The streets tend to reappear in Massachusetts sometime around March. The only problem is that I’m still hoping to take some sort of marketing class this spring, though the more I think about the way I learn, the more I wonder whether it would be more effective to…

  • ask people who have studied Marketing what the end-of-term assessment looks like (how do you tell how much you know?)
  • make a list of topics/resources/things to read and work through (read: apply), in 12-15 batches of one week in length (there are plenty of books in libraries and open course materials online)
  • carve out a consistent time each week to meet with Somebody Who Knows About Marketing, then begin bribing people with cookies to hang out with me (online, in person, whatever) and look at what I’m doing, field questions, etc. at that time. This would be instead of “class,” but would keep me going and regularly accountable for something. It could be a different person every week, so long as all the weekly slots got filled
  • put together some sort of assessment at the end, depending on how Marketing students get evaluated. I think the way I’d love to do this is quals-style – get smart people who do marketing for a living in a room for an hour or two some afternoon (again, bribe with food…) and have them grill me ruthlessly on anything and everything they can think of, poke holes in my logic, criticize the miniprojects I’ve done (likely with Fedora Marketing) in order to apply the stuff I’ve learned through the “semester” and force me to assess and defend them, etc. and then tell me where I can be better.

Wait. I just realized this basically describes a self-designed grad school course. Huh. Maybe I should do that and get a notion of how I handle this sort of workload.

Maybe I should go to sleep.


Email shoveling, interrupted


Sprint 1: Target 310 or lower; actual achievement 270 (however, almost certainly went over time as this sprint was spasmodically done on trains/buses/lounges/planes on the way to DC). This was an 100% offline sprint, mostly cleared from older archives with ruthless “NO RESPONSE NEEDED!” archive-clearing, interrupted by a few email replies when my perfectionism occasionally got the better of me and demanded a good response before closing off a thread.

Sprint 2: Target 135 or lower; actual achievement 285 (not really as bad as it seems; a flood of email hit in the meantime).

At this point, I noticed that my hand/arm/shoulder muscles were taut in the wrong places, meaning that I should ease off a bit and work through my muscles (which I did; they’ll be fine for tomorrow now) so I took a brief nap and then biked/bused/train-rode into town and played with dogs and cameras and had tapas for the remainder of the evening.

The email adventure will re-commence tomorrow; I’ll do email sprints in between work sprints. Hoo-yah!


My only goal tomorrow


…is to get through my inbox backlog. All of it. I don’t care if I get nothing else done; I’m catching up on email.

The bar has been set. There are 621 threads (not emails, threads) I have to go through; since that’s over 10 hours if I go through one email per minute, I’m going to have to adopt a different strategy. I’m going to try Inbox Xeno On Steroids: work through my inbox backlog in sprint of no more than one hour in length, and every sprint must deal with at least half the threads. Thus after 1 sprint I should have no more than 310 threads to go through; after 2 sprints, 155, then 77, then 38, then 19, then 9, then… well, if I can’t deal with an email in 15 minutes, I’ve got bigger problems than an overloaded inbox.

The key word here is ruthless. That is the adjective I will be applying to the verbs “delete” and “archive” en masse during the course of this adventure. PERFECTIONISM WILL DIE. Or rather, since my perfectionism seems to be stubbornly baked in, I can whale down on it as hard as possible and still be pretty sure it isn’t going to break/snap/go-away; turning it on will always be an option, so I’m going to practice turning it off. A lot.