[M]etabrain [E]ntry [L]og - Braindump of the Mel. Seek coherency and relevance at your own risk.

I do not like writing cover letters and resumes. I do not like feeling like I am peddling myself to other people. I do not like having to actively seek recognition, because it’s usually something I don’t quite feel that I deserver (yes, I’m working on eliminating that feeling by using The Power Of Rational Thought). I do not like thinking about how much I “should be worth” in terms of salary and such. I do not…

I just want to be able to do things! Contribute to things! Help people! Learn stuff! You know – be useful. I do not feel useful, or even meta-useful, when I am doing self-promotion. Time I spend “selling myself” is time I don’t spend Getting Stuff Done (other than self-promotion).

Applications (for jobs or otherwise) are a useful mental tool to use for self-evaluation. They also bugger me all to freaking heck (I’d use stronger language, but would end up waving my arms around frantically while gabbering incoherent syllables) when I feel like I’m taking them way too seriously.

I do like sleep, and that is what I will do now.